LDS Podcast "Latter-Day Lights" - Inspirational LDS Stories
Popular LDS Podcast "Latter-Day Lights" gives members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints the opportunity to share their stories of inspiration and hope to other members throughout the world. Stories that members share on Latter-Day Lights are very entertaining, and cover a wide range of topics, from tragedy, loss, and overcoming difficult challenges, to miracles, humor, and uplifting conversion experiences! If you have an inspirational story that you'd like to share, hosts Scott Brandley and Alisha Coakley would love to hear from you! Visit LatterDayLights.com to share your story and be on the show.
LDS Podcast "Latter-Day Lights" - Inspirational LDS Stories
Sharing More About His NDE - A Year of Reflection: Jerry Paskett Returns to Latter-Day Lights
In this special follow-up episode, Jerry Paskett shares more information about his near-death experience, his recovery, the psychological battles endured, and the patience and perseverance that have become an integral part of his life.
Jerry also shares some of the spiritual insights and lessons he's learned since his experience, and how it's helped him to strengthen his faith and the faith of others.
*** Please SHARE Jerry's story and help us spread hope and light to others. ***
To WATCH this episode on YouTube, visit: https://youtu.be/NyaeMdFxEXA
Or, if you want to WATCH his original episode, visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngNslua0nM4
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Also, if you have a faith-promoting or inspiring story, or know someone who does, please let us know by going to https://www.latterdaylights.com and reaching out to us.
Hi everyone, I'm Scott Brandley.
Alisha Coakley:And I'm Alisha Coakley. Every member of the church has a story to share, one that can instill faith, invite growth and inspire others.
Scott Brandley:On today's episode, we're going to hear how, a year after sharing his near-death experience, one man is learning to push forward with faith, knowing, through patience, the Lord will answer his questions. Welcome to Latter-day Lights. Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Latter-day Lights. We're so glad you're here with us today and we have a special treat for you. We're actually bringing someone back, jerry Paskett. If you remember, he shared his near-death experience about a year ago and we asked him if he would come back on the show to see how things have gone since then. Welcome back, jerry.
Jerry Paskett:Hi guys, it's great to be with you.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, great to have you.
Jerry Paskett:It's great to see you, I was just thinking.
Alisha Coakley:When Scott was like we're bringing one man back, I was like from the dead you did Almost yeah.
Jerry Paskett:A little play on words there, I know.
Alisha Coakley:I was like where are you going? With that Scott. Yeah, but really really Jerry.
Jerry Paskett:Jerry come back.
Alisha Coakley:You definitely were one of our favorites. We absolutely loved your story. I mean, the spirit was so strong, so I'm going to encourage everybody. If you guys haven't heard Jerry's first story about his near death experience, uh, we'll I. I'm sure we can probably put the link to that in the comments or in the description here, or you guys can go go search it on our page, um on youtube. But you definitely want to take a listen to his first story because it was just so full of miracles and and like the spirit was so strong.
Alisha Coakley:I just remember crying. I just cried so much by the end of the show I didn't have any makeup on, I was just like, oh my gosh, it was. It was beautiful and fantastic and full of lessons and really has done a lot of good, for sure, since it's aired about a year ago, and so we're really excited to kind of find out what's been going on. You know, like where are you at and what's happened, and you know, have you learned anything new and do you have any more good lessons for us? So we're really excited.
Jerry Paskett:But before we get too far I need to ask one thing. Just a little bit of clerical clear up here. I need to know how the blonde tornado is. Oh no your listeners are going to have to go back and listen to how she recruited, how she recruited me. Do you remember that story? Now, I do, I do.
Alisha Coakley:I was like blonde tornado and then boom, Yep.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah.
Alisha Coakley:That's Scott's daughter. She recruited me for the first recording. Yeah, she's a funny duck. Cool, very cool.
Jerry Paskett:So, yeah, just a little bit of recap of what the original interview was. In November of 2021, I went into the hospital with COVID and you know I got increasingly worse and by Thanksgiving of that year I had been moved into the ICU and then, shortly after that, I was put on a ventilator, put in a medically induced coma. I was in a coma for two and a half months and then during that time December 14th of 2021, is when we know that the body and the spirit were separated for a period of time, and a whole series of miraculous miracles happened, not just with me but with my family and with friends, and it was an experience that was just, it was cherished by so many different people and it just kind of showed how the Lord worked. Through that experience, I stood at the veil and you know, I made the choice. I looked to one way and there was a veil and it was very inviting and warm and magnetic. And then I looked to the other direction and saw friends and family that were pleading for me to come back, and I made the choice to come back.
Jerry Paskett:So I spent 142 days in the hospital and well, I'm still in the recovery process. When I came out of the hospital, you know, I had to learn to do all sorts of things all over again walk, talk, speak. Every part of my body was broken, and then the psychological. A lot of confusion that way, but it took several months to start putting the pieces together. But in the end, you know, it's been a miraculous, miraculous experience for me.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, yeah, it's. I'm just going to say, listeners, if you haven't heard a story, or even if it's been a year, right, even if you have heard it and you want a refresher, um, I'm going to give you permission to pause and then go listen to it, and then come back and listen to the part too, but uh link in the description too.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, that'll be awesome. But before we get into all that, do you want to just kind of remind the listeners a little bit about who Jerry is and what he likes to do and where he lives, and all the good things?
Jerry Paskett:Yeah, I live in northern Utah, self-employed. I own an automotive repair shop and I've done that for many, many years. I've got a crew of 11 people and it's funny because the experience that I shared back a year ago, a lot of the people that were involved with my work were also part of the miracle when the body and spirit were separated. So that was fun to make that connection there.
Jerry Paskett:Shannon and I, you know, loved to motorcycle and tour the US on the back of motorcycles and we've got kind of a little senior gang of friends and family now that are starting to go with us and that's a lot of fun to be able to do that as a group. She's still deeply involved in search and rescue. I don't know if you remember we talked about that or not, but we, we've got search and rescue dogs and she's deeply entrenched in that. I haven't been able to do it because, um, you know, I've gone back to work. So that's that's. The wonderful thing about this recovery is that I've been able to go back to work and been able to do that full time. So, uh, we have six kids, we have nine grandkids and just loving life.
Alisha Coakley:So life, life is better. That's awesome, all right. Well, mr Jerry, I guess we will go ahead and pass the baton to you and kind of let us know, like, where, where are you now? How did you get here? What's happened since you were on the show last year and, um, you know what kind of what kind of things were you able to to learn in this last?
Jerry Paskett:year? That's a great, great question. Um, if I had to sum that up in just a few words, it's been an amazing year of self-discovery. The miracles have continued, the experiences have continued. I've been able to discover a few things about what I experienced on December 14th when that happened.
Jerry Paskett:I don't know how much you want me to go into detail on that first recording that we had or if I just pick up and go from here. So please ask any questions that you might have along the way, but just to kind of set the stage for where things were when I got out of the hospital in April of 22, I had to learn to do things all over again and I came home, you know, very, very weak, very feeble, and had to regain a lot of the strength. But one of the things that I experienced was I was also struggling, you know, psychologically, mentally and physically, not just the physical elements, and it took me a while to realize that that was all part of the healing process as well. But one of the things and I kind of broke it down a little bit into the struggles that I had and some of the open-ended questions from my original interview with you and one of the things that I really struggled with was what was I to do with the experience that I had had?
Jerry Paskett:Here I am, you know, I had this amazing, miraculous experience where I stood at the veil. I knew very much where I was, I knew what I was being asked to decide. I was oh. I always struggle because I don't want to sound overly confident, but I did. I knew where I was, I was fully alert. I was fully aware that.
Alisha Coakley:I had a decision to make.
Jerry Paskett:And when I made the decision to come back and I was granted that decision, I had to figure out what to do with the experience and so when I came back, what I found was when I got out of the hospital, I was a little bit overly excited about the experience and I've oftentimes thought about people who have near-death experiences. I'm wondering if they've experienced the same emotion because they come out. I remember Vinnie Tolman when he did the podcast and he talked about this amazing excitement that he had and I could relate to that. And who was the gal that had the near-death experience that saw the Savior as a young woman?
Alisha Coakley:Bridget Bridget, cook-birch Bridget.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah, she was also. You know, I listened to her experience after I recognized what I was experiencing. She had the same kind of excitement. When you have something like that happen, you want to share it. You want to share it with everybody and you want to say, hey gosh, do you realize what's waiting for us and what the Lord has worked out?
Jerry Paskett:I found that I maybe got a little bit too excited and maybe a little bit of a pride factor stepped in. I found that I was having, you know, maybe some unrighteous visions of grandeur. You know, am I going to be a public speaker? Am I going to write a book? You know, am I going to be sought out? And the irony of that is that's just not me. And so those kind of feelings. You know, I had to check those at the door because I thought that's just not me. And so those kind of feelings. You know, I had to check those at the door because I thought that's just not me. But what am I to do with this experience? You know the Lord had handed this to me and given me this gift and said do something with it.
Jerry Paskett:And very, very early on I was out to the barn with my horses and just kind of reflecting, asking what am I to do with this experience? And that's when I was whispering in my ear. You know, this is not your story to keep. You may be an integral part in this story, but there are a lot of people that were influenced by what happened, and so I had to try to sort that out in my mind. But there was another element that was going on as well, and that is the power of the tempters. Satan was working on me and he was on my shoulder all the time. Jerry, are you sure this happened to you? Are you sure this isn't just a feel-good story? Are you sure you're not making things up? Are you embellishing this a little bit? Is it really what you say that it is? And then the classic question, the one that probably hurt and stung the worst, is why would the Lord love you enough to share something like this with you? And those nine, nine thoughts just kept going, and this went on for months and months. And, uh, very, very, it was very painful. It's very confusing, because here I am, I've got the excitement of what had happened to me, and then I've got the excitement of what had happened to me, and then I've got the pull of negativity, an absolute tug of war going on inside of me. And then I had one of the more miraculous things happen to me throughout all of this and that is when I was in the hospital. I got a backup.
Jerry Paskett:When I was in the hospital a good friend came and visited me and it was about two weeks before I was discharged and he sat down with me and we were talking about the experience a little bit and he said you know, I'm not exactly certain that it was the 14th, but it was right. In that time frame. He says I woke up with a start at 3 o'clock in the morning and I knew something had happened to you and he left it at that. He didn't say any more about it. Nine months went by. I got discharged, I got stronger and stronger and I got to where I was able to manage life much, much better. And he and I we went to lunch and I said to him you know I remember you sharing with me what happened that night in the hospital, but I was a little bit cloudy. It's been nine months. Can you tell me the experience again? He says okay, I'm not sure that it was the 14th, but he says it was right in that time frame. I woke up, he recounted exactly three o'clock in the morning, sat right up in bed and I knew something had happened to you. And then he went on to say I went to work that day and when I got home that night I told my wife I believe Jerry had to make a choice today. That hit me. Here we are, we're in a restaurant, we're eating lunch, and that hit me like somebody had slugged me in the stomach. I started gasping, started choking, my eyes started to tear up. I couldn't control my emotions. I gained my composure. Thank him for sharing that with me. But I walked out of there really, really confused. This was on a Wednesday afternoon that we had met for lunch. So Wednesday, thursday, friday this was on a Wednesday afternoon that we had met for lunch. So Wednesday, thursday, friday.
Jerry Paskett:I'm pleading with the Lord and I was almost angry with God and kept asking him why did you withhold that from me? Why would you keep that information? Went into Saturday, woke up to that Saturday morning. Why would you keep this from me, god? And I just kept pleading and pleading. Why wouldn't you share that with me in the hospital? So I knew.
Jerry Paskett:And then, once again, I was out in the barn. This must be my quiet place because I get a conduit. I was out in the barn with my horses and I'm just standing there watching them. I'm asking Lord, why? Why did you wait? And then that soft, comforting voice said I knew you would doubt Craig is your witness. And immediately I felt a sense of calm and all those doubts and all those buffetings of Satan where he had been beaten on me, they disappeared. And I knew. I knew very, very clearly that the Lord knew me much better than I knew myself, that he knew that I had to go through that battle.
Jerry Paskett:And then, in his own due time, he shared with me that second witness.
Jerry Paskett:I called my brother, doug. Do you remember Doug? Doug was the one that was in the ICU that came in and said brother, talk to me. And then he heard that voice that said he needs a couple more days. Do you remember that part of the story? I do, yeah, and I called him and I shared with him the experience and he said Jerry, you need to know that on December 13th I gave you a blessing and in that blessing, lord told me to tell you that you were going to be required to make a choice. So I had that blessing of having not only a second witness but a third witness that what I had experienced in the veil really did happen. And I can't tell you how big and how powerful that is to me because of the doubts that I'd felt and I can, you know, I can truthfully say I know it's not a feel-good story it really did happen.
Jerry Paskett:So as soon as that happened I thought, okay, I've got to have some kind of a reset on what to do with this. And so I got really diligent in talking with the Lord again about what do I do with this? Please tell me and this was not a get on your knees, spend two hours your knees, go to sleep, your back starts to spasm, kind of conversation. This was a quiet, whispering time. Come on, god, talk to me. Whispering time, you know. Come on, god, talk to me, tell me. You know what I'm talking about, right. And then once again, I'm walking through the barn. I can remember exactly right where I was as I was walking back and that very quiet voice said those who need this experience will find you. And again I felt that immediate peace, that pressure of what to do with it was taken away from me, and I knew that this would all work out the way God had intended to do and not the way I intended it. Alisha, you're smiling, like you can relate to what I'm saying.
Alisha Coakley:No, you know what it is. It's like you just said that and my mind went to Grace, our little tornado right Like our little firecracker, like she found you. And it was really her who like was like you have to be on my dad's podcast. You know what I mean.
Alisha Coakley:And so it just made me smile because I was like, oh like, there you go, like Heavenly Father gave you an answer. He said you know, they'll find you, those who need to hear it will find you. And so it's just, it's just kind of neat to like see, like how how this kind of was propelling, and and I, you know, I am a a really big believer that when we're ready to, to live that purpose, um, and when we're really striving to do what it is that Heavenly Father wants us to do, like he will put people in our path, he will make the most interesting connections. Uh, you know, he just he knows how to network really well. So, um, I, I well, he does you know what I mean.
Alisha Coakley:Like scott, you know we're, we're business people and and we're always like networking is like the thing, right, but really heavenly father knows how to network the best, and so it's. It's interesting because I I've been seeing a lot of that in my own life and in different things now, and so I'm like my cheeks are hurting a little bit so. So if you can just tone it down so I'm not smiling so much, that'd be great.
Scott Brandley:I was going to say. So one thing that I liked was, um, you know, you were, you were initially thinking like, what do I need to do? Do I need to write a book, like, do I? You know, and you know that's not the only way to get something out there, right? Um, you know, and we each have our own story and and if we put our faith in god and and he knows what we're capable of, he knows what our skill set is um, not all of us are writers.
Scott Brandley:Not all of us are writers. Not all of us can, you know, go on film or no, else you can get your story out there or go speak, you know, in a fire, but he knows what we're capable of and he knows who needs to hear our story and he's going to figure out the best way for us to get that story out there. So I really think that's that's cool that you got that answer, cause that seems to fit your personality, like just from what I know of you. Um, but I also feel like you've gone out of your way to out of your comfort zone, even to talk to us on a podcast, and I really appreciate that you're willing to do that.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah.
Scott Brandley:I agree with.
Alisha Coakley:Scott, I remember and this is just a little, a little, I guess, sneak peek behind the scenes for our listeners but even when you did come on, we recorded first. Do you remember this, jerry? We recorded and you called me and you said I don't think that we can air that, and you were really, really sincere, and I remember you just being so heartfelt in that the first recording you just didn't open up about everything. You were really worried about what were people going to think if you shared this or shared that, and so you kind of doled your experience down. And I'm so glad that you reached out to us because we decided let's rerecord, let's just start from scratch, let's do it again. It's totally fine. And we did.
Alisha Coakley:And so much beautiful spiritual experiences came out in that second recording, and so I love that, even though you thought you were ready and you took the step, and then you realized, oh, I didn't do it the right way, like there was another way. You know, like heavenly father gave you another opportunity and I I don't know about you, but I know for me it was almost like a lesson in, like, like I don't need to be afraid to do what the Lord asks me to do Right, like I can just trust that, that he knows best, and so if I just get out there and I just do what it is that he tells me to do, he'll work it all out. You know, and now here you are, and I can see like just even your confidence from like the very first time we recorded, and then the second time, and now this time you seem to be so much more sure of like where you are and what you experienced and where you're going. And so there's a glow, there's like this just very sure glow about you.
Jerry Paskett:That's bad lighting.
Alisha Coakley:Sorry, I'm getting a little emotional.
Scott Brandley:It's the light from the baldness.
Jerry Paskett:Yes, it's the building solar panel. Yeah, you know, it's interesting that you use that word networking because when I was told that those who needed me would find me. So let me set the stage here. I've told you that we were pretty entrenched in the motorcycle world where there was a group of us that went for a ride and we were out in Duchesne, utah, and for your listeners that's a mountain kind of a mountain desert town out in Eastern Utah and there's two or three convenience stores. It it's pretty small town but we'd stop there to take a break and get gas.
Jerry Paskett:I'm standing at the front door waiting for the rest of my party to come out and there's just this absolutely beautiful bike sitting there, um, all blacked out, with a little bit of chrome. It was perfect, it was just absolutely beautiful. And here comes this elderly gentleman about my age, which makes me an elderly gentleman also, but he comes walking by and he's all leathered up and I says is that your bike? And he says yeah, and I said that's absolutely beautiful bike. And he starts talking to me and as we started chatting he started telling me about his wife and that his wife was in the hospital, had been in the hospital and she'd been in the hospital at the same time I was and he was giving me these dates and she had passed away from COVID and it was while I was going through my experience also, and he had had 37 years of marriage and they had a very, very strong marriage. And he starts sharing with me the heartache and how he was trying to adjust and how he'd met someone. And I'm just listening to him and then I felt very strongly that I needed to share just a little tiny bit of my experience with him. And I shared that experience with him and I says I just want you to know that she wants you to be happy, that she is here and I, you know we talked about in our original broadcast about guardian angels and I am convinced that those loved ones who have moved on are our guardian angels. I've seen them. I may rephrase that I have not seen them, but I have felt them and I have felt their presence many times. And I assured him that she would want him to be happy and we talked for a while, we parted ways, he went his own way and I don't know why this was on a Saturday afternoon, but I kept thinking about him and I knew one thing about him and I knew that he was from a small town in central Utah and he did snowmobile exhaust.
Jerry Paskett:So I went on a search to find this guy. That's all I knew about him. And I started calling places that were in the exhaust business and I said his name was Scott. I said do you have someone there by the name of Scott that owns the place? And I finally found him and I says okay, this can be the weirdest phone call of your day, but I need to know if this Scott is the owner and if you would give me his phone number. And he says we'll give you the phone number. So I called him and I said Scott, this is Jerry Paskett. You and I met on Saturday. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. This is on a Tuesday morning. And he says oh my gosh.
Jerry Paskett:He says I spent eight hours this weekend looking for you on Facebook or any kind of social media. Well, you guys, knowing a little bit about me, course I don't do facebook um, so he uh, but he had looked for me for eight hours and just checking in with him. But I think that that's kind of an example of what the lord has in mind for those who need this experience will will find me absolutely.
Jerry Paskett:that is so cool I want to share with you one other example of that, and this is probably one of the more touching things that have happened with them finding me. I was asked to speak to a young adult or to a young man young women's group combined and I went in and I shared the experience with them and at the beginning of the meeting I felt strongly impressed to tell them that if they would just leave the troubles of the world at the door for just 50 minutes, I promised them that they would feel the spirit of God through what we talked about. And then I bore testimony in the beginning of the meeting that what I was about to tell them was true. And we had an, we had an incredible conversation and I got a phone call from the bishop of that ward that night and he says I just want you to know that I got a call from a mother. Anytime I I hear that I think, oh boy, what have I done? She says her 13 year old boy came home and he was so excited. But he said mom, mom, I felt the spirit of the Lord today and, as neat as that was, I really kind of drilled down on that and I thought I can't remember what the spirit of the Lord to a 13-year-old might feel like, and the more I thought about it, I thought what an amazing feeling that that's got to be at that innocent age of 13 to. It's because of the message that I have been able to share with him that that little 13 year old was able to feel that. That really touched me. I felt I felt very, very blessed to be able to experience that with him.
Jerry Paskett:So, um, so, one of the other things that I really hadn't I want to talk a little bit about this is I really struggled with my testimony and I remember many times I would sit in church in a testimony meeting and I think, okay, I've had this incredible experience, and why am I sitting here? Why am I so afraid? There was one particular meeting when someone brought up miracles and I remember clearly thinking well, I know a little bit about that, you know, and we're encouraged to testify, we're encouraged to share those kind of experiences. But, guys, I was firmly held into that seat. I was so tightly bound into that seat that I couldn't get up, and this went on for months and months, and months and I finally thought, okay, I've got to get to the bottom of this, what is going on with my testimony?
Jerry Paskett:And it wasn't a matter of me not having a testimony or having lost it.
Jerry Paskett:I still had the basic beliefs, belief in the restored gospel and all the things that, from very young ages, we stand up at the pulpit and we testify of as kids, as we develop. That I just could not put words to it. I couldn't figure out what it was, and so I did a really what was a very, very powerful exercise for me, and that is I decided to put a pen to paper over two to three nights, in those quiet times at night when I'd have and I'd sat down and I just thought, as I was reading back, I remember one line I wrote come on, jerry, just open up and let it out. And that was all on paper and I wrote it out, and that was hugely, hugely beneficial for me. And at the end of it I came up with with what I found to be the most powerful part of my testimonies and, if you're okay, I would like to share those points with you because they were so powerful for me, or is that not appropriate?
Alisha Coakley:Oh, it's appropriate yeah.
Jerry Paskett:The number one thing and I was just literally thrown up on the paper. The number one thing is I found the power of gratitude, being thankful and gratitude is something before my experience was gosh. I'm thankful for all the things that I have. I've got a nice house and a great family and I've got help. Gratitude to me now is I am so grateful that I can breathe. I am so grateful that I can roll over and get out of bed under my own power, that I can roll over and get out of bed under my own power. I am so grateful that my Heavenly Father loved me enough to share that experience with me.
Jerry Paskett:And what I found was, with these really small acts of gratitude that we so often take for granted, that there's a change that occurs within us, that we love easier, we love better, we want to serve. We're a service organization in our church. We know this and we're constantly being told you know, we need to serve here, we need to serve there, do better, do better, and you have great acts of gratitude. You want to serve, you want to love. That was one of the points that stepped out of me. Another point was I am so grateful for trials and, as weird as that sounds, I'm so grateful for the trial that I experienced, because within the trial lies the miracle. And I remember an exercise where I went through and I thought what can I remember in my life where somebody experienced a miracle, that things were wonderful in their life at that time, when they weren't struggling and I couldn't come up with anything. And so, in the importance of trials and the fact that we have to have them, that they are the Lord's way of grooming us and I have been groomed because of what I went through you know, I really, really do believe that trials are just an incredible part of our existence.
Jerry Paskett:Another thing that I realized was that God is the architect of my plan, that my plan, in my view, is already written and now I just have to do the work. And it's a real simple plan. It's the same plan as yours. It's just try to get back to him because he loves us that much. And then the final point of that exercise was that I realized the power, the true power, of the sacrifice, of not only the son but the sacrifice of our Heavenly Father. Our Father sacrificed mightily for us in sacrificing his son, and that was an aha moment for me. So that was another one of the struggles that I really had was coming up with that. But another one of the things that I kind of left open ended when we did the interview was describing my feelings at the veil. I don't know if you remember or not, but I said I cannot in earthly words figure out how to describe the feeling.
Alisha Coakley:Right.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah and yeah. If you remember, alisha, you asked me, was it kind of a physical pull or was it kind of a spiritual pull? You asked me that and I my response was well, it was both. Well, that feeling at the veil, it is, indeed, it was both. Well, that feeling at the veil, it is, indeed, it was both. It was quite literally, my body was being pulled towards it and I had to resist going that way. And I don't want to get lost in the bushes on that because I don't want to take away from the experience, but I really wanted to go in there.
Jerry Paskett:I've had a lot of battles thinking, jerry, why did you make the decision that you made? Because I can remember very, very clearly how strong that pull was. But at the end of it, you know, what I've determined is I've determined that that feeling that I felt at that one time and the only time I've ever experienced in my life, one time and the only time I've ever experienced in my life that that is a level of God's love, that he's saving for us for when that time is right for each one of us, and I believe that if we had that feeling surrounding us all the time, we wouldn't want to continue on our mortal journey here. We wouldn't want to continue on our mortal journey here, and I'm very, very comfortable with that. I'm comfortable with that. Knowing that that's a level that's waiting for me, it gives me hope every day. So the level of.
Jerry Paskett:God's love that we got to look forward to.
Alisha Coakley:I I remember one of the prophets there, or the apostles or something like that, had had mentioned, if we had just even a glimpse into eternity, like just a glimpse into heaven, like we would all be, we would all be done with this life, we'd be like Nope, we're going back, and and we would just all give up at once. And so, um, I, I absolutely believe you and and I think, knowing what you have been through and and having been there and experienced it and everything like that, um, I wonder, do you, do you feel like you still have to make that choice every day to stay?
Jerry Paskett:For the longest time. I thought that my coming back was relatively short-lived. Shannon, my wife felt like it was short-lived. We kind of felt like there was something that was going to happen, that I would be moving on, and so I sought out a blessing from it and in the course of that blessing and consequently, the gentleman that gave me the blessing didn't know anything at all about the thoughts or feelings of my heart he didn't know anything about it, but one of the things he said in that blessing is that I would be here longer than I thought I would, and that was another one of those.
Jerry Paskett:Okay, I can feel some peace now, but one of the things that has happened and I find that this is really, really interesting is that I have to battle every single day not to slip back into old behavior. I have to try really really hard to keep that perspective and knowing what I have to look forward to and fight off that desire to slip back into what I used to be and what I used to know. Because, guys, the reality of it is I wasn't a bad person, but I thought I was a pretty good person. I tried to be a pretty good person, but I was entrenched. I was deeply entrenched in my own arrogance and my own pride. You know, Jerry Paskett, big tough guy, you know Nobody's going to tell you what to do, Nobody's going to tell you how to live, you know, and the Lord had to humble me and I love him more because of that.
Alisha Coakley:I think that one of the things that you had mentioned was just like that struggle with your testimony right, like how you were, like it's not that I didn't have one, it's that I had to figure it out again, or something there that you couldn't come up with words for it you know, and I had, I had a uh, a moment, um, the night that my brother died, when I remember just laying in bed and just sick to my stomach over the thought that, all of a sudden, everything I had believed in, you know, like I'd always believed that there was an afterlife, I always believed that there was an eternity where our spirits would go and reignite with Heavenly Father, but now, all of a sudden, it was so important for me to know, I couldn't believe it anymore.
Alisha Coakley:I had to know, I had to know that somewhere my brother still existed. I don't know how else to put it in words, but like I just couldn't grasp the fact that he wasn't anywhere anymore. You know, like he wasn't here, so he has to be somewhere. And and I remember laying in bed and I, you know, I'm trying to go to sleep because we had this long trip, we had to, you know, leave to go to Elko in the morning, and and I was just so tired and I was so emotional and so hurt and and I just couldn't stop thinking like he's got to exist, he's got to exist. And so my prayer was really sloppy and not formal at all, but I just remember asking Heavenly Father, like please, just please tell me that he's still him. You know that there's still something there that is my brother.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah.
Alisha Coakley:And I had this really weird moment I mean, I was very much awake where I heard almost like this, where I heard almost like this I don't know how to explain like a zizzing sound that came really really close, really fast to my ear. And in that same moment there was you know, I'm laying in bed and my eyes are closed In my mind I had this little bluish, white colored orb thing, that kind of. I just I don't know how to explain it, except for when you had like those old school, like big box tvs and you would turn them on or off, like how the screen would like collapse really quick or it would expand really quick. It was like that. But it was an expansion and um, and it went from this little kind of bluish white light and it expanded out and it was so bright in my mind that I like I knew that I should be like flinching, but I was comfortable in it, like whatever that was. And very, very briefly and very I mean so quick, so brief, but at the same time it felt so slow.
Alisha Coakley:I could imagine this. Just this hand that kind of just went like this and just sort of swiped something a screen or something like that off to the side just a smidge, and all I could see beyond that and I was pretty far away all I could see beyond that was just figures of light. That's all. I don't. You know, it wasn't. There was no identifying anything. It's not like I saw my brother or anything like that, but it was just such a quick thing and I remember, as soon as that hand put that curtain or that, whatever it was, that it had moved out of the way. As soon as it put it back, the darkness came again and I was in my room and all of a sudden I had this rush of grief. It was like in that moment I didn't realize that all of that grief had been taken away from me until it just flooded back in an instant and I felt like there was a calling on my chest.
Alisha Coakley:But I remember thinking to myself that was my answer. There is more, it is real, and I don't have to worry about that as part of my testimony anymore, because it's not a testimony. That as part of my testimony anymore, because it's not a testimony, it's a truth. That's all there is to it. It's just a solid, hard truth that I don't ever have to question.
Alisha Coakley:And it feels so inadequate, like trying to put it into words that make sense to other people and that encompass like the feeling that I had and the experience that it was for me personally. And so when you were talking about your testimony changing and how you just didn't know how to put it into words I almost wonder if a part of that was your conversion too, and maybe it just was. Like you know, we think conversion sometimes is big and holy and it's like so wonderful feeling, but sometimes it's really scary because now it's like you can't go back to ignorance. Now you know this, what are you going to do with it? Now you're going to be held to a higher standard. Now you're going to be, you know, put in a position where you do have a bigger target on your back by the adversary, because if he can make you fall after you've been converted, man has he won?
Alisha Coakley:I almost think that we all have these moments of conversions in our life, in all different areas of our testimony, and so it's not that one person is more converted than the other or anything like that, it's just different. But I do think that when we have those moments and when we recognize that true conversion, it almost helps us to step a little more into the role that we were meant to play. All of a sudden, it's like the things that maybe bothered us before, the weaknesses that we might have had, the fears that we might've had, they don't feel as big, but there are new fears now, right, there's like a new sense of like, what do I do with this? Where do I go from here? How am I supposed to exist? Like you feel separated, that's the best way that I can explain it.
Alisha Coakley:I felt separated from everything and at the same time I felt like there was just this surety, like there's not, like nothing can happen. That tell, that can tell me. Otherwise, you know. So I don't know that's. I don't know where I'm going with that. I'm sorry, but I just, I just wonder if maybe that was part of your own conversion. You know like what, if that was.
Jerry Paskett:That was heavenly father's way of showing you like you don't have to think that this is true anymore, because you know that it's true well, what I'm hearing from you, alisha and I and I, I think I understand, I think I agree is the greater, the greater the knowledge, the greater the knowledge, the greater the responsibility, kind of thing. Yeah, is that right.
Alisha Coakley:Oh yeah, and it's scary and overwhelming sometimes. And then it goes back to that little devil on your shoulder right when you're like, why me Like? Why would the Lord love me that much? Or why you know, like, what have I done? I can think of a million other examples of people who have been through more and who have come through on a much higher mountain than I'm on, and who have way more talent and who have more of a testimony and a bigger reach. And so why would the Lord want me to do anything grand? I should just play small.
Scott Brandley:Yeah, yeah, have you asked yourself that, jerry, why?
Jerry Paskett:me? No, I haven't asked. I haven't asked myself that because, especially when I got that, the second and the third witness on that weekend, and I knew definitively at that time that something had happened to me that I could never, ever deny, and so why me was out of the question. It was just what do I do with this? And that was given to me also, people who need this experience will find you like that 13-year-old boy that says I feel the spirit of the Lord. You know that sounds like such a small thing, but it was huge for me, yeah, to hear that perspective of a young person like that.
Scott Brandley:Well, that could be a huge deal. I mean if yeah you know, a 13 year old is pretty impressionable. They're trying to find their way in the world right, trying to figure out their testimony. And if you can help that one 13 year old feel the spirit and recognize it, I mean that can be life-changing for him. Yeah absolutely and I mean that's amazing that you got to play that small part in his life that could change his life forever yeah, you know I hope so.
Jerry Paskett:I know that it sure had a significant impact on me.
Alisha Coakley:This is simple as it was, so you know both ways yeah, and I love that you were privy to that, because a lot of the times, like we share our testimonies or our stories or our thoughts or insights and like we don't get to hear whatever happened from that Right, Like we don't get to hear how it impacted someone else until you know much, much later, or maybe not even in this life at all, and so that's like a, that's like a huge blessing to be able to hear you know, kind of, what kind of impact you had in that moment.
Jerry Paskett:So well, you're going to have many more of those for sure, for sure, no no, so, so so, but that that's kind of what the year has been like in a lot of self discovery, I feel like in many ways, I'm a different person than I was, certainly don't get caught up in the things of the world like I used to and honestly, I like it. I'm really, really looking forward to kneeling at the Savior's feet and thanking him for the trials that he's given me.
Scott Brandley:What a unique perspective.
Jerry Paskett:So what is?
Jerry Paskett:your plan from here um, I took a lot of comfort when I was told that those who find me and I just kind of sit back and I sit back and I wait. No, that's that's the wrong way to put. I don't wait, I look, look for opportunities to to be able to open up dialogue with people. I had a great conversation with someone that was not of our faith and he knew how sick I was and he just flat out said so, did you have anything weird happen to you? Well, since you asked, let me tell you so, and we had a really, really great conversation and I knew he was touched. He was touched by the Spirit, whatever level that was, it was okay. It was his to be experienced, and my main focus right now is just doing everything I can to continue to go closer to the Lord and to not allow myself to slip back that brings up.
Scott Brandley:a question though, I have for you when you talk to Heavenly Father when you pray. How does that feel now that you've had that experience Like? Is it more intimate? Are your conversations deeper? I'm just curious. I mean, with the perspective you have from the experience that you had, how does that affect your prayers?
Jerry Paskett:I know how to answer that question. I know how I feel. That's a pretty intimate question.
Scott Brandley:It is. If you don't feel comfortable answering it, you don't have to.
Jerry Paskett:Let me put it to you this way I find that it's easier for me to dial into the spirit now, for example, that 13-year-old boy. In my view, I was able to finally tune in to what he felt like, and I was able to kind of feel like what it was like to be 13 years old again and feel the Spirit of the Lord, and that was a hugely impactful experience for me to be able to think because you know that was a lot of decades ago for me, that I was 13. And when I talk to you about you know how, how the Holy ghost has communicated me with me out in the barn and and and talked with me. It's a great comfort to know that I can recognize what that is, recognize what that is. Maybe, just maybe, I'm getting myself to the point where the spirit can bust its way through that impenetrable shell that I had around me before I got sick. I was pretty prideful. I don't know if that answered your question or not, scott.
Scott Brandley:Yeah, that gives me a little more insight. You know, it's just something that you wonder, because I mean people that haven't maybe had an experience like that. We're always, you know, when we pray, we're always trying to get through and wonder if our prayers are making it. I don't know. But, just to have an extra level of insight into the relationship with God and knowing, having I don't know more of a knowledge that he's there and that he's listening. Just wondered how that affected the prayers that you do have.
Jerry Paskett:Well, just in the examples that I've shared with you tonight, you know there was a great deal of patience that was required and also I didn't expect to get answers. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you I was mad at the Lord for withholding that information from me. I had gone through, you know it was kind of a personal torture, but I'd gone through tortures. Satan was, he was railing on me. You know, every day I was asking myself did I really experience this? Am I lying to people? Am I embellishing this? Am I lying to people? Am I embellishing this? Am I trying to draw attention to myself? Shame on you, jerry. Shame on you. And the funny thing about it is, as I said to you both with conviction when I interviewed with you a year ago, that I knew what I'd experienced was real. That conversation with my friend Craig had happened a week before that, just a week before, actually, it was the day before we interviewed. It was the Saturday before we interviewed on that Sunday, when the Lord had whispered to me Craig is your witness.
Alisha Coakley:So can I ask do you feel like? Do you feel like your spiritual gifts, um, how do I want to phrase this? Do you feel a greater sense of urgency to like, like, increase your spiritual gifts, to strengthen them more, to figure them out, like where you're at right now and how you feel about them and how you view them, and everything like that, since, since all no.
Jerry Paskett:I don't feel the sense of urgency at all. What I feel like is that I need to simplify the Lord's love, that his plan is a perfect plan and he loves us so deeply and he loves us so very much. And we talked about the sacrifice, and not only the son, but the sacrifice of the father, and it was designed to get us back to him and we just need to simplify it and then do the work and those spiritual gifts will come as a result of that.
Jerry Paskett:That's been my experience okay I'm gonna have to chew on that one thing that I like from this.
Scott Brandley:one thing I like from this podcast, jerry, is your brutal honesty and and your transparency, because I mean, you didn't have to tell us, like at the beginning, that you know you're like, oh, can I make money doing this? Or you know, like, am I going to become famous? And some of the struggles you've had with you know, your anger with God, like some of the trials of faith that you've had. You didn't have to come and tell us all of that, but I really appreciate that you did because you know. I think that helps me to feel your genuineness and your true desire to make sure that you are telling the true story of what really happened. Like you, which I, which I really appreciate because that makes me feel you know that you are really trying to share the, the experience that God wants you to share.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Scott Brandley:That means a lot I can cry, I just want you to know that.
Jerry Paskett:Well, thank you. I've asked myself many times, you know, when Bridget saw the Savior and when Vinny saw himself put in a body bag, and there are volumes written about near-death experience and passing beyond and everything. I didn't see spirits, I didn't see angels and I've asked myself why, why couldn't I have made the decision on the other side? After I saw the park and after I saw the cafeteria and I got to see what they eat, was my dog there? You know, why did I make the decision at the gates of it? Instead of going beyond, and I am completely at peace with I was given what the Lord needed me to have.
Jerry Paskett:He gave me what I needed right and it's, it's truly been enough for me, so.
Scott Brandley:I love that.
Jerry Paskett:Wow, I don't know, have I upset the apple cart here with my brutal honesty, scott, no like I said, I appreciate it.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, no, I like I said, I I appreciate it.
Scott Brandley:Yeah, I mean, that's how I would if I had an experience like that, I I would hope that I would share it the way that you have done, um, and I can see how there could be temptations to try to try to monetize it or try to capitalize on it.
Alisha Coakley:Right.
Scott Brandley:And I appreciate that you've, that. You shared that with us, because that just makes it feel so much more genuine. You know, you know, I mean, even the savior was tempted right after he fasted for 40 days.
Alisha Coakley:You know that's true, you know, that's true.
Scott Brandley:And you know so you're not the only one. But uh, he rejected it too, and I don't know. Interesting thought.
Alisha Coakley:Well, and I, I think that a lot of us have those thoughts like, even if we don't have a big near death experience or anything like that, we have those thoughts of like, did I really feel a spirit, especially after time? Right, Like, especially after you've experienced, you know, some time that's passed between a moment where you, you really felt that spirit strongly and and where you are now, Like I, I feel like we all go through that. We're like, well, I mean, it was spiritual, but was it really that big? Did I really hear that? Did I really, you know, do I really have a testimony of this? I think, um, I think we do doubt, Right, but I love what, what? Um, I think it was um president Oaksdorf said where he said you know, doubt your doubts, right, Doubt your doubts. Like, know that you, you had these moments. And I do think that kind of goes hand in hand with like, why? Why we're encouraged to to keep a journal, to write these things down, to share these experiences, because the more we share, I truly believe, the more like we remind ourselves of what happened, you know, and how that, uh, that affected us and what it means to us.
Alisha Coakley:I think, just like the gospel is consistently being restored, like the restoration is not done right, Like we know that, like we're still getting truth and knowledge and we still have this growth that's happening in the restoration of the church and in the restoration of the gospel.
Alisha Coakley:I think that our testimonies are constantly in a state of growth and of being restored and being edified and strengthened and shaping and molding into what it is that they need to be at a certain time in our life to accomplish the things that the Lord needs us to do, so long as we keep seeking after righteousness.
Alisha Coakley:But I I truly believe I know we said this before we started recording today that Heavenly Father can take, he can take the stories from each individual and he can put it into the lives of those who need to hear it Right, Like it doesn't have to be a certain way all the time and it doesn't have to be perfect for the spirit to to come through and to speak to our hearts.
Alisha Coakley:And so we really I know Scott and I both really appreciate you, Jerry, and appreciate you coming on here and sharing your story and sharing the light of Christ with others and sharing that love, because we need it in this world. We really, really do. We need to hear these stories of faith and we need to be inspired to seek after God's love and to be a part of giving that love to others, and so I really hope that as you move forward I know you're going to run into adversity, because that's just going to happen. Everybody who ever tried to do anything good in life always had negative forces and negative voices, too right, Like people who didn't understand or didn't believe us. But I know that your story and your voice and your lessons are definitely going to help to spread that light of Christ, and so I appreciate you.
Jerry Paskett:I hope so.
Alisha Coakley:I really miss to come on.
Jerry Paskett:Well, thank you guys, for your amazing work I feel.
Scott Brandley:I feel it's kind of I feel lucky to be able to talk to you and and have this experience like it feel. It feels like that's kind of fish.
Scott Brandley:But it's just such a cool experience to actually, you know, talk to you and and hear your experience, because it gives me hope, right, it just reinforces the hope and the faith that I have inside and it's just, you know, like that tiny, a little bit of light that I can hold on to because you've been willing to share it. So I just really appreciate that and I don't want to take that for granted. I'm going to try to be grateful for, like you said, be be grateful for this moment and for this time we had to do this podcast together today.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, and I'm going to, I'm going to be a networker right now for you and I'm just going to let you know I, I am still working with Vinny Uh, he's actually my life coach right now and so we's a, we's a friends and I I am feeling very much like that needs to be a connection between you and him. So if you would like, I would be more than happy to reach out to him and, uh, to get you guys connected and and Brooke connected, and Brooke too, I'm talking with her about some book stuff, and so if you would like to connect with both Brooke and Vinny, I'd be more than happy to play magic.
Jerry Paskett:Well, if they'd like to talk to me, because you know, one of the interesting about it is when people have I don't know if this is just me, but if other people who have had these near-death experiences if we share the common emotions that come with it and you know, I've oftentimes thought gosh, there ought to be a support group for near-death experience people you know so you can exchange, you know what happened and find out. Am I crazy or did you feel the same thing? But I know I'm being cynical here. I value, I really really value the experience that I had.
Scott Brandley:That you know what.
Scott Brandley:That reminded me of a story, jerry, and I think you're right. I think you're right. I think that is a good thing to have, where you can talk to somebody that's had a similar experience to you, because you can tell a story. What kind of can of worms did I open up? 10 younger brothers so there's 11 boys but me and my uncle that's younger than me.
Scott Brandley:We went to the temple, the Salt Lake Temple, on the same day to go get our endowments and back then, when you checked in at the table, you walked down a ramp into the temple and we were both walking down this ramp and as we were walking down it, I could feel the spirit come up my body, and it was. It was a very real feeling. I could just feel every step I took down the spirit was coming up. And I turned over to luke. I said, do you feel that? And he's like yeah, and we were both walking next to each other down this ramp, feeling the spirit come up over our bodies. So I do believe that when you have an experience with a spiritual experience, there are things that you can relate to with people that have had it yeah so I definitely think that would be a great opportunity to meet with them and share those and see how that how those relate to each other.
Jerry Paskett:Well, I would be a very good listener. I know, we'll just record it.
Alisha Coakley:We'll just get all of them on, all three of them on at the same time. Scott and I will just sit back and just we'll observe the whole thing.
Jerry Paskett:Can you imagine what kind of round table discussion that would be?
Alisha Coakley:It would be an eight hour long episode. It would be all day long. Grab a snack and then, and then we'll take potty breaks and all the things.
Alisha Coakley:Oh man no but I, I I do just thank you, Jerry, for coming on here and for just being you and for being willing to share your experiences. We really, really appreciate it, and I know that our listeners definitely appreciate it too. Is there any last thoughts, or is there that's not proper English? Are there any last thoughts that you might have or anything else that you'd like to share before we wrap up today?
Jerry Paskett:No, I'll let you guys close it out. You've heard enough from me. So I appreciate the work that you're doing, scott. I appreciate you voicing to me that it was okay to be raw, it was okay to be transparent, to me that it was okay to be raw, it was okay to be transparent. You never know if you're getting too far out of your lane. So thank you for that. I'll go away from this feeling, feeling more comfortable now.
Scott Brandley:That was probably the biggest takeaway I got from it, Jerry, was your, was your willingness to just be honest and and transparent there, to just be honest and transparent there. So I just hope you know that.
Jerry Paskett:Yeah.
Alisha Coakley:Thank you.
Jerry Paskett:Well, keep up the good work. I look forward to every Sunday listening to you guys.
Alisha Coakley:Well, thank you.
Scott Brandley:We got one.
Alisha Coakley:Yep, oh, thanks Jerry.
Scott Brandley:Yeah.
Alisha Coakley:Well and to all of our listeners. Thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of Latter-day Lights. We really appreciate you guys. We appreciate your comments, we appreciate your shares. Just like every Sunday, we're going to ask you guys to do your five-second missionary work.
Alisha Coakley:Hit that share button, make sure that this part two of Jerry's story gets out. You never know what's been said here today and and like how it can affect somebody and how it can really help with their testimonies or or with answering questions that maybe they they might've been struggling with for some time. So we highly encourage you guys to comment, let us know and let Jerry know what your favorite part of his story was. Go back and listen to his first story too, so that you guys can really get a refresher on what it is that he's gone through and the beautiful experiences that he's had.
Alisha Coakley:And remember, if you guys have a story that you want to share, one that can instill faith, invite growth or inspire others, be sure to head over to our website, latterdaylightscom, or you can email us at um. What is our email? It's got latterdaylights at gmailcom, so you can do that. You can comment. You can find us on Facebook. There's lots of different ways to get in contact with us. Um, we would love to hear your story and we would love to uh to be able to continue to spread, spread light throughout the world.
Scott Brandley:So yeah, and go and make some comments in YouTube or wherever you're watching this, so that Jerry can read them.
Alisha Coakley:Yeah, absolutely.
Jerry Paskett:Thanks guys.
Scott Brandley:Okay, well, thanks again, everybody, and we will talk to you next Sunday, take care.
Alisha Coakley:Bye.
